“I guess I’m a tad too rash. Especially with firearms. I’m heiress to the Golzine clan. It’s like, a freaking empire. And although I don’t mind talking M&As and asset management, in the end, I can’t help but jump into the action, you know? I’ve been told I was an unruly child. I often ran away from my studies. Grandpa got so mad, he could be overwhelming sometimes. But I loved it when he had Sen teach me self-defense and how to shoot. Dad went nuts but Grandpa was right: if I don’t do something, I get restless.
I mean, dad was permissive too. I can’t complain. I was allowed to play soccer with other kids, can you believe it? I’ve always felt more comfortable around boys. I got a boy’s name too, it confuses some people. That was the intent, my mom says. Anyway, soccer is how I met my friend Jay. Jay is so totally a breath of fresh air because he is so normal. Later on, I met Ash through Jay by the way… I could never have imagined what the consequences would be.”
“Now, I love mom, but she’s more like a sarcastic friend than a mother, really. Dad… my relationship with my father is another story. When I was a kid, I idolized him. He understood me, shielded me. He was driven and unfailingly loyal. Then he went ahead and disclosed that he cheated on mom and had a child with that other woman. That that child was Ash. That the sweet boy I couldn’t live without and had just shared intimacy with was my half-brother.
‘Cause I had immediately felt attracted to Ash. Call it fate, magnetism, genetic disease, whatever. I don’t care what it is or who he is. I crave for his kindness so much it hurts, and I can’t protect him by staying away from him. Even if he won’t give me what I want and I keep on looking for him in every man I meet.
So I go on hating myself and hating my father, and I slept with that forty-something trader, but even he is not fooled by our emptiness, and I slept with Jay and broke his heart in the process. I also slept with my subordinate, Lance. I wonder if that was wise. When is it too late to turn back time?
Oops. Looks like Ash and I got sent forward in time instead.”